It appears that cinemas have been increasingly concerned about diminishing ticket sales while home entertainment systems become more popular. I propose that they should be more proactive in competing with the DVD market, and here are a few suggestions:

1. Do not show adverts before the feature. Or try and persuade the government to pass a law making adverts on DVDs (ones that cannot be fast-forwarded over) compulsory so that DVD viewers suffer as much as cinema-goers.
2. Allow cinema-goers to take digital cameras into the theatre with them so they can take a shapshot of any scene that they like from the film and turn it into a screensaver on their pc.
3. Equip the cinema-goers seats with stop, pause, rewind and fast forward buttons. This may sound impractical, but it could work on a majority vote basis. Should the film begin to drag a bit, and should more than half of the viewers wish to skip to something more interesting, they should be able to press the "skip to the next scene" button rather than just sit and endure it. Similarly, should more than half the viewers wish to pause the film so they can go to the loo, do the ironing or make themselves a cup of tea, they will be allowed to do so.
4. Remove ratings on films. Or keep the ratings, and bar underage potential viewers from purchasing tickets, but simultaneously allow their parents or "older friends" to purchase tickets for them. Then allow them to go in and watch the film. Because surely one of the big draws of DVD is the liberty given to thoughtful parents to allow their 10 year old to watch Showgirls.
5. Stop fighting piracy. Stop telling us repeatedly not to record the film. Obviously, the film industry cannot prevent pirate copies of movies coming out 6 months in advance of their cinematic release, so just jump on the bandwagon: cinema owners should download the shoddily recorded rough cut of X Men3 from the internet and show that in their multiplexes instead of waiting several months to show the "official" version.
6. Give more to the viewers! Add a blooper reel, deleted scenes, a couple of games and a documentary to the end of the feature.
7. Change the cinemas so they look more like the insides of people's bedrooms or lounges instead of cinemas. Have couches, or even beds, instead of individual seats. Instead of snack shops selling ridiculously oversized and overpriced popcorn and coke, install a kitchen with working fridge, toaster and kettle, so viewers can go and make themselves a snack (should the pause button on their seat allow them to do so).
8. Replicate the process of hiring a DVD - force the cinema-goer to stand in an overheated room for half an hour wasting time before letting them purchase their ticket.